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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.
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Svetlana Zwetkof
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Jacob Gonzalez
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1.
angry child 05:01
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You’ll take my jealous eyes and crush them grey blue into a diamond I’ll be staring on angrily my face Flushed from embarrassment I’ll be sick of myself again Like I’m always sick of myself And I hope one day I will not be Smeared on your forehead like god’s carbon Tracing your long long eyelashes I don’t know when the day will come and I don’t know it will happen But until the day I hope that I can be a stronger thing You’re dripping your sweat at the back of the house looking out the window It’s not really there but you’re looking you’re looking for another life I’m looking I’m looking I’m not really there And if you’re perfumed as much as all the others then Under my thumb you would wriggle free like a Coin I dropped under the bar again, like a coin I dropped to get your attention Deep inside the fountain I made myself bored with my own face and my eyes and wide wide forehead And I thought what a surprise it would be if I could summon the courage to kill myself but I myself Never will give into killing myself I myself will never be so lucky because there’s no point to living no point to dying no point to me I’m tired little jealous, I’m tired little jealous I’m tired little jealous, I’m tired From afar you kissed each other I saw through the corridor I passed your ghostly embrace As if two arcs of light traced between you back to the other Those arcs my flanks But supple as they were I couldn’t hold onto them, too wispy too ethereal too light They sank into brick and mortar, those fronds of your connection, those loving and lonely nights So beautiful all the other women, whose faces light up like the sun I am an angry child without expression I am the barrel of a loaded gun
2.
pilgrims 02:41
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What is this world if not a tangle of many things Mama’s gonna buy you a diamond ring Boy Boy you light me up Boy Boy you light me up
3.
Focus 01:29
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for someone with such focused eyes, don't think I've ever seen you focus more than when you picked a song to put on and every other time you were looking at absolutely nothing focus on a little point in the distance until you can't complain and can't see anymore
4.
golden apple 03:51
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Eris’ fruit in my palm I roll it hand to hand I dare not bite the fruit, I am only one woman I secret away myself the parts of myself most knowing and clear For to be knowing and clear you would know me better And I could lose what is most dear You are my absolute favorite all I want is for you to stay I will be like rock and ice if it means you will not go away I will be like rock and ice if it means that you will stay In the back of your car I could be rattling Anxiously rattling off everything wrong with me Or I could be swiftly moving, swiftly gained If somewhere my heart was loud but only loud enough to weigh, to weigh I secret away myself the parts of myself most knowing and clear For to be knowing and clear you would know me better And I could lose what is most dear You are my absolute favorite all I want is for you to stay I will be like rock and ice if it means you will not go away I will be like rock and ice if it means that you will stay
5.
intimate 02:07
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today i will not be jealous, i'll wear my heart on my sleeve today i will embrace distance and walk with you like i walk with me today i'm holding onto you as gently as i ever could today i'm holding onto you, if you let me, hold i would give me your affections if you need me to be kind i can be like water flowing i can be crystalline if you need me prostrate at your feet i cannot provide but if you want to hold me i will you i will never mind i can be the most kind i can be the most kind i can hold you close and i can be the most kind i will hold you close and never mind i can be the most kind i can hold you close and nevermind
6.
freezing cold 02:41
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In the winter Left my coat indoors, indoors Barefoot walked into the woods My feet bleeding cracked from snow In the storm I was naked ‘cept my gooseflesh Freezing cold freezing cold Wondering where the hell I was I was manic I was the fog Cold as ice Freezing cold freezing cold, wet as fire Hot as coal I cast a spell I saw god She said her name I could not perceive it It must be beautiful, it must be beautiful Beautiful, beautiful freezing cold freezing cold Lights flashed and I saw god She held my hand she took me in We moved in an ambulance like lightning fire Forest caught fire Freezing cold, freezing cold, dry as timber Wet as mold Freezing cold, freezing cold, freezing cold, freezing cold
7.
ohsoadone 03:05
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oh so i done give everything i can be the sun and the stars i can be the wind and rain i can be my mother's child i can be the forest wild i can be your anything but i cannot be your everything oh so i don't give everything anything i can be anything i can beay anything i can baey i can baey
8.
pexy 02:09
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To be discerning I carved my thought into my palm I made a stamp of my own hand and bled my mark onto your thumb To make a decision I made an incision With surgical sutures I laced you up Don’t come undone Don’t come undone I need this to be surgically fixed I cannot tolerate this ache any longer It will be mortal, it will be mortal My sins will be affixed In a sinopexy transfixed they will not float freely in my stomach And accept, I will accept Mortally, mortality And accept, I will accept Mortally, mortality
9.
lady 02:22
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what kind of girly magic enables you to be so beautiful?
10.
swivel punch 03:01
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i swivel on the ball of my foot i slap her hand from your hand i swivel on the ball of my foot how could you lie to her like that? i swivel on the ball of my foot my palm hits your face clap clap i swivel on the ball of my foot you spit your teeth into my hand i swivel on the ball of my foot her hand pulls my hair into bunches i swivel on the ball of my foot she doesn't want to understand i swivel on the ball of my foot she doesn't want to understand i swivel on the ball of my foot how could you lie to her like that? i am filled with terror as my stocky fate approaches glassy paned my palm hits face my face hits palm i hit my face i hit my face. off flies my terror terror i brace myself for collide i am filled with terror as my stocky fate approaches as i swerve around your comments and avoid eye contact i can feel the fisted eagerness pushing behind the umbilicus i am filled with terror at the hand of my actions i swivel on the ball of my foot i slap her hand from your hand i swivel on the ball of my foot how could you lie to her like that? i swivel on the ball of my foot my palm hits your face clap clap i swivel on the ball of my foot you spit your teeth into my hand i swivel on the ball of my foot her hand pulls my hair into bunches i swivel on the ball of my foot she doesn't want to understand i swivel on the ball of my foot she doesn't want to understand i swivel on the ball of my foot how could you lie to her like that?
11.
angry child ii 06:54
lyrics
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You’ll take my jealous eyes and crush them grey blue into a diamond I’ll be staring on angrily my face Flushed from embarrassment I’ll be sick of myself again Like I’m always sick of myself And I hope one day I will not be Smeared on your forehead like god’s carbon Tracing your long long eyelashes I don’t know when the day will come and I don’t know it will happen But until the day I hope that I can be a stronger thing You’re dripping your sweat at the back of the house looking out the window It’s not really there but you’re looking you’re looking for another life I’m looking I’m looking I’m not really there And if you’re perfumed as much as all the others then Under my thumb you would wriggle free like a Coin I dropped under the bar again, like a coin I dropped to get your attention Deep inside the fountain I made myself bored with my own face and my eyes and wide wide forehead And I thought what a surprise it would be if I could summon the courage to kill myself but I myself Never will give into killing myself I myself will never be so lucky because there’s no point to living no point to dying no point to me I’m tired little jealous, I’m tired little jealous I’m tired little jealous, I’m tired From afar you kissed each other I saw through the corridor I passed your ghostly embrace As if two arcs of light traced between you back to the other Those arcs my flanks But supple as they were I couldn’t hold onto them, too wispy too ethereal too light They sank into brick and mortar, those fronds of your connection, those loving and lonely nights So beautiful all the other women, whose faces light up like the sun I am an angry child without expression I am the barrel of a loaded gun

credits

released September 21, 2019

everything by svetlana zwetkof and her dog. woof

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Shouter Whisperer image

Shouter Whisperer San Antonio, Texas

My momma hatched me and I was forced to wander the earth in search of the beat

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